10 years

I cannot believe it's been so long. This day is always filled with such raw emotions for me as I go back in my mind and grieve all over again. I have your ultrasound displayed in my room so you are with me all the time. I'm always wondering what if, who would you both have looked like, would you have acted like me or your Dad? Just wishing you would have been here to make memories with all of us. I miss you more than you will ever know. You truly are two of my greatest gifts and one day I believe that we will meet again. Lots of Love and Big Mommy hugs babies!! Until next time.

SuMmEr TiMe!!

Well we are 1 full month into Summer vacation and it's been Hot, humid, cold, decent, you name it after all it's Michigan. We have done lots of Fun things. Like I took the Girl Scout Troop to Mackinaw Island and Mackinaw City for a fun get away and earned some badges along the way. We had a Blast on the island, eating at the Grand Hotel, taking 2 carriage rides and hear facts about things on the island, visiting an Art Gallery, riding the Ferry, shopping for fudge and spending time together. <3 Seriously a great experience! I would recommend it for anyone to do as a Girl Scout mom or leader. It was also bittersweet as our group will be losing one of our long time members this coming scout year. As the girls get older and grow and change I know that it is always an option that they may not rejoin. It happens but it still makes me sad and I will miss them as they go...and grow! Speaking of change we have been making more on the home front. I have been trying to remember that ALL things change. It's always good but sometimes it's not always easy. I have been helping my Dad tear down and old trailer on our family farm. We have been working closely every day and that has brought me great joy and made me get to know and appreciate him a lot more than I ever have. Not only was this trailer old and run down, it was my first home as a child. Where I came home as a baby, where my brother accidently slipped on a magazine and threw me through the air onto the couch! Where we shared a bedroom and had birthday parties, where we both learned to walk, appreciate family, and farming and all that they both stood for. I am the reason that the trailer has been torn down and don't get me wrong I was so happy to help and get rid of it but being there and hearing so many stories of my childhood, my brothers childhood, my cousins and Dad's childhood and all about how our family farm just came to be. It gave me a whole new understanding and appreciation that I just didn't have. Of course I thought I did but now I know that I didn't. I'm glad to be moving forward and putting down roots in my home town at my Grandparents old homestead. It will truly be an honor that no one can understand unless you do it. More changes that we have been facing is our children, they are growing up before our eyes. Our daughter is a preteen and will be 12 in 21 days now and our son will be 9 in September. We have been facing middle school and all it's challenges. Friends, drama, classes we like and don't, teachers we love and those that we don't, friends that are new and Awesome, friends that we've had for what seems like a lifetime that are no longer there. It's not easy to watch your kids struggle through these challenges and not try to fix it for them. Also some classroom challenges that just make public school and all it's practices seem very archaic and yes it's hard for me to say that being that I work at a Public School building and I Love my job and truly do feel like we do make a difference in kids lives. I couldn't honestly count the little hearts that have melted mine with their sweet hugs or precious goodbyes, nice good mornings or buying lunch with me, asking me to walk them to class. School is Hard! Friendship is Hard! Parenting is Hard! Life in General...HARD! We surely will face more parenting, school and well in general life challenges but at least that means we are alive and here to face them. Thanks God for those that you have placed in my path. I love them all and I don't know what I would do without them! XOXO

Over the winter we added two more boys to the mix. I have fallen head over heels in love with them and I'm so glad that we've added them to our family. The kids enjoy walking them, playing with them and loving them. Janae does an exceptional job of taking care of them. They came to us when we were looking for no more fur kids but, now looking back I don't know what I would do without them, they are great little critters and we have no regrets. These two great dogs used to belong to one even greater man. He was a loving father, husband, son, brother, uncle, Grandpa, and last but, certainly not least Friend. He was a very good friend to my Dad and I loved him too. My little family would tag along to their dinner outings just to be with them all and join in their love for life, friendship and great stories of other times. He would love to run dogs with my Dad and cousin and some of their other friends. That is why he had "my boys." I never remember anything but a smile from that man. I know how hard it is to miss someone you love so much and I cannot imagine how their family feels with such a huge hole from such a great soul. But, I still feel his kindness and his love with my friendly, furry little critters. Thanks to his family for passing them on to us.

Summer Friends

This summer we have really focused on spending time with those we love. We made no BIG plans going into summer and after it started we did a small "Bucket List" of a few things we each wanted to do this summer. Even though we did that mainly what we have done this far is hang out with some of our favorites and some that we don't get to see a lot during the busy school year. It makes me happy that my kids are enjoying the little things this year and not wanting bigger stuff. They are enjoying pool time and Twister, lake time and card games. Hide and seek and the water slide on their swing set. Loving the library activities, books and movies we get there. Camping under the stars in our tent, sleeping on bouncy mattresses and snuggling in our sleeping bags. I <3 that I am not pressured to work during the summer so that I can focus on our kids and myself. My husband is the hardest working man I know and he is so good to us. He cares about how we are doing and that we are well. Not about the money and how we have to stretch it over the summer months! He surely is a one of a kind and I'm so glad that he's ours. This summer has had it's awesome moments but it has also had one very hard learning experience as well. We are an animal loving family, we have dogs, a cat, fish,and hermit crabs, we have had turtles, lizards, and many other fish, frogs, and cats. A couple of weekends ago on June 10th we had to make a very hard decision to put to sleep our very first Behrend fur baby, Harley. Michael and I got him after we had only been together for 3 months so he has truly been a part of our family since the very beginning. He was a roly-poly puppy when we first got him and we fell in love with him immediately. He grew in our hearts as much as any other child would. He hated going in the house as he would get too hot but, he loved to roam the yard and kiss anyone that would walk by. He enjoyed the kids and their laughter and he never was bothered when the kids would try to ride him when they were little. Such a kind and gentle animal who was loved so much by all of us family, friends, even my girl scouts. I'm happy to have had him for almost 14 years but, I'd be lying if I said I wish I had a little more time. Can't wait to see what the rest of the summer might bring. We definitely will find a way to enjoy or learn from it whether it be a happy or sad experience.

Sleeping Bear 17

3 days and 2 nights at some of the most beautiful lakeshore that God and Michigan have to offer us. We stayed at DH Day campground in Glen Arbor. Camping, sight seeing, playing cards, water and beach time, walking, historical sites, beauty, ice cream, family time, SO much to be thankful for on this trip. Believe me this trip was not without it's trials, we had "quiet time at 10" and with these kids that just don't happen unless they are asleep! AHHH... we had 21 year old neighbors who talked way too loudly when filled with liquid courage and talked about things that my kids didn't need to hear about or the other neighboring kids the other way. Our Jeep decided to not start and we had to have it jumped. However we had a great time. Janae made breakfast on the camp stove with her daddy, Evan and I slept in a little bit longer. We enjoyed long walks at the beach, playing a game of cards before bed every night, ice cream at new places and Lake Michigan! The kids each got sworn in as Junior Rangers and swore to help watch over our National Parks and to "keep their rooms clean." (My personal favorite!) The history and resources the little journey's in that book taught them were definitely worth it. We all learned along the way about the historical sites like the old Olsen farm at Port Oneida. We also got to see the old schoolhouse and use the old pump (which is the only source of water that they have there still.) We got to see what waterways have done for our great state in the past up to present day and we learned how and where the Coast Guard lived and how they "operated" back in the early 1900's. We let the kids walk to the beach with the rules of not going anywhere near the water since we wouldn't be with them right off. We told them directly we will walk that way in 5 minutes so we can all watch the sunset together. We watched them go talking, walking, and being friendly with one another. I truly love when the world isn't in the way and they actually get along for a while. We then put out the fire and put away our things and walked down to the beach. They are not directly in front of where the boardwalk goes out so of course inside of me I start to panic a little and think what did we did, why did we let them go alone!? Turn to the right and sure enough they were down making friends with one of our camp neighbors, a man from Sparta and his daughter Holly. Great people they love to hike and camp with their kiddos. He plays guitar and was teaching the kids to skip rocks when we arrived. When we got down to them it was almost like we had known them for a long time and just hadn't seen them. The kids played and we told of other places to camp so we could all go on new adventures in the future. I am so thankful for people like him who watch out for others as we do and not just ignore and give me dirty looks as I sent my kids down first unattended. There was also a lady behind us who was camping alone probably in her 60's and she was quiet, reserved. Honestly came across as down right rude. Well turn ahead to morning 3 and she was sitting at her picnic table painting. Janae was very intrigued so she stood by and watched and finally got the courage up to go talk to her. I was so proud of her personal growth at that moment! She walked right up and asked her what she was painting and they continued their conversation until it was time for us to go and I had to go collect her. I loved that she stepped out of her comfort zone and made that move. She grew up literally before my eyes today. She told us all about the lady and how she made herself a promise to paint every day so that she would get better at it and that was what she was doing. She also showed her the painting that she did yesterday and it was beautiful Janae said. She thinks it was of Port Oneida because it was of old barns. Glad a connection was made in two generations that seem to be growing worlds apart day by day.

O.M.G. So life happens and I totally forgot about this beauty! I cannot believe 7 years have went by. WOW! So much has happened and so much has changed. I'm in a new profession at Central Montcalm Elementary School, I am a Paraprofessional and work with kids age 4-7. Janae is going into middle school! She will be 11 in August and in 6th grade. She has joined the band and picked for percussion, she still enjoys Girl Scouting and all that it entails. Evan will be at the Upper Elementary this year in 2nd grade. He enjoys playing soccer in the spring and fall and he is ALL boy. Loves to be dirty, to ride his bike on and off ramps, loves the dogs and our kitty. Michael is still driving truck and enjoying it. We have added 2 doggies, (Tucker and Bear) to our family and literally lost our turtle. That's a story in itself. HA! It's funny to look back over the pictures that are on here and see how much things have truly changed in our lives. Day by day it seems to go slowly but looking back it goes SO fast!! It's summer now so the kids and I are off, adventuring, learning and playing. We have sat down and done a family summer bucket list. We are excited to check some of those things off!!

Ionia Free Fair

We had a great time at the Ioina Free Fair...we took my niece and two nephews with us and met my Mom and Dad there and they got to ride rides and we watched part of the circus. We all got to wander around and have some fair fries!! YUM!

Our trip to the Fish Hatchery, Paris MI

...and a few from home (July) we decided to take a day trip to Paris so I could show everyone in my family the Fish Hatchery...we had went there a couple times when I was a kid and I remember having such a good time as a kid with my brother and my cousins. Well, Janae, Evan, Michael and I had a great time too. We had a picnic and Janae even got to make her own peanut butter sandwich (ahh the little things) We played in the park and then met Grandpa, Grandma, and Lexie Paige at the Mecosta County Fair!